A Sunday Ramble

The past four years have had the fabulous moments (helping in starting The Digit-al Dozen, meeting a bunch of fabulous bloggers, finding an "in") and some not so great moments (computers crash, hang nails, depression, anxiety, no longer part of The Digit-al Dozen). I chose to step down from the Digit-al Dozen as I haven't been very active on my blog. It was really heart-wrenching and the DD ladies have become some of my closest friends (only having met one in real life). But life and my depression/anxiety got in the way. 

So why no nails?

I would get physically ill when I sat down to do my nails. The anxiety was so bad that I just couldn't do it. If I did manage then I wasn't satisfied because my manis didn't look like the other DD ladies. My manis never really blossomed or got better over time. I just wasn't that good and having that pressure would stir up the anxiety even more. I always want my nails to look like so-and-so and have the painting and artistic ability as what's-her-name. I'm not satisfied with my own talents and abilities (and not only with nail art) and so therefore feel the need to step back (but say that to my stamping plate group buys. What is wrong with me!? Hahahahaha!). 

For some reason, this past year has been really rough on me. I am not at all where I ever thought I would be in my life. Ever. I thought I would be married with kids by now (I'm turning 35 in less than a month). I am almost sure that I will never marry; I don't allow myself to be in situations that create an opportunity. And it I did find someone? I don't think I could put them through what I have to go through. I would be too draining, too much for them. How could I bring anyone into what I go through? How does anyone that have mental health issues bring up the issue while dating. I would see it as almost a red flag for most people. 

Oh, but to have that someone who would be there and just tell you that you are not alone. That you can make it through it again. To be aware that you actually exist and that they actually care for you. That they are aware of you and that there really is something wrong when you say that you're "fine". That is my dream. Anyone else have that dream?

Currently working on tapering down on one of my medications. My new doctor was surprised at the dosage I was on and said that this medication is one that you don't want to stop suddenly and that this high of dose could be causing more anxiety. So for the next three months I will be cutting down by 0.5mg. We shall see what happens. He already lessened another medication I was on, because again, I was on too high of a dose. Seriously, what was the previous doctor doing to me!?

I realized that I have been medicated for more than half my life. Crazy to think about that. I am very interested in see how I would be without any medication. A lot has happened with my body and brain since I started any medication, heck, I went through puberty! But I am also very nervous about trying to go without (with the help of my Doctor, of course) my meds. I have no issue or negative thoughts about being on medication for the rest of my life, but I feel they may have been become almost a security blanket, and that makes me nervous.

I keep having thoughts of adding makeup info and photos and whatnot to my blog because it is what I am interested in now. But I feel again, that I am second rate compare to all those that I follow across social media. Aren't we our own worst enemies? Pfft. Would that be anything anyone would be interested in? If there is anyone still out there still looking at this blog. I have no idea.

So yeah, that's my ramble. No real rhyme or reason to the order of my thoughts, just wanted to get  some thoughts out there, or were those too many thoughts? Ramble ramble ramble. 

Please let me know if there is any interest for me continuing with any aspect of the blog. Yeah, yeah, I should be blogging for myself and what I want to blog about. But let's be truthful here, we all really want to know that people really do care about the fact that we put forth the effort to blog. Yes, it's an outlet but I also want it to be an outlet that I knew was being listened to and visited.

Welp, there's that. 

And here's my eye look from Saturday (and I'm wearing contacts, eeks!). I got so many compliments from my coworkers, it was really nice. There are three different Lit Glitter colors on my lids. :) 

Irresistible Me Royal Remy Hair Extension Review

Hello Owlets, it's almost been two full months since I last posted (I will explain all of that in another post) and today I have for you a different kind of review. Sorry about the photo quality. I believe my camera is dying a slow and horrible death. Maybe I should ask Santa for a new one!

I was contacted by Irresistible Me to review a product of theirs, hair extensions. My curiosity was peaked, hair extensions + pixie cut? Is that possible? I goggled and searched and you tubed and was only able to find a few with my length of hair. Hmmmm, I thought, interesting, I wonder.....let's play!

So the extensions come in the box shown in previous photo. They then come in these cool looking zippered pouch. Why the two compartments? Well, the smaller one holds one clip in extensions that you can take out and test the color before opening up the entire package. How cool is that? If you chose the wrong color you would simply return it and that larger bundle could be used again! How thoughtful and very economic.

Here is the clip in that you use to check to make sure you chose correctly. And I did! As you can see it also comes with extra clips that you can replace lost ones if needed, like the little bag of buttons that come with fancy shirts.

I chose Royal Remy Hair in Medium Brown (#4), 14 inches, and the 200g set as it gives more pieces.

Next I am showing you the four different clip in pieces that you receive.

This is the largest and obviously the fullest and heaviest piece. This four clip in gives a lot of volume.

These are the three clips. I liked to use these first to give my hair a more natural look.

Five two clip clip ins. These are great fillers to help blend the hair all together.

And finally, two one clips. These are great to use to fill in as well, I only wish there were more of these.

A closeup of the clips. They are those bendy kinds, so they are easy to put in. This closeup also shows some of the different colors in the hair which gives it a much more natural look.

So here is me rocking my own hair (and an awesome shirt!). My hair here is longer than I normally have it, I'm due for a hair cut. But I figured this length would blend better than even shorter hair. (ugh! I hate taking pictures of myself!)

Ok, now I am in no way an expert on hair extensions, I know these don't look all perfect; but I think I did a fantabulous job putting these in.

It was so fun to wear them around. I haven't had long hair in over 20 years, and then it wasn't even this long. I felt like a mermaid! :)

As you can see, the color is perfect! As is the thickness/volume of the hair, meaning I don't have a poof of hair around my shoulders. They weren't heavy and there was no pulling (except for me pulling hair off my lips when it would get stuck in lip gloss. New experience for me).

I am definitely wearing these more often. I think I'm going to take them to my hairdresser to get them trimmed/styled a bit so they frame my face more. Still deciding. But you can color and curl these, possibilities are endless!

I had no issues with the extensions (well, one of the clips came loose but one little stitch and it's fixed, no problem) and would absolutely recommend anyone and everyone who's ever been interested in trying hair extensions to go through Irresistible Me. They also have other products on their site: styling tools, hair care products, and accessories. A little bit of something for everyone.

Thank you Irresistible Me for letting check something off my bucket list of having tried hair extensions!

What's Up Wednesday - October 28, 2015

So I was going through my blog feed a couple months ago and came across this really cool post from Steph's Spot Blog. She links up with other bloggers (Mix & Match Family, Pinterest Told Me To, The Larson Lingo <--- The ladies who created it). So I thought I would try it out. :)

What I'm Eating this Week:

Let's just say this pertains to everything right now. :)

What I'm Reminiscing About:

My years at University. My niece is headed to the same University that I attended and I've been helping her find housing and deciding on classes. It totally made me want to go back 8-10 years ago (graduated with my BS in 2007, but I'd redo two years) and be back in that school atmosphere. I miss it so much. Do I miss the homework and all that junk? Hmmm, yes and no. The stress - no; but the learning - yes.

What I'm Loving:

That it is fall and all the Owl themed items! Yay!

What I've Been Up To:

Coping. Can I just say how well Allie from Hyperbole and a Half, perfectly describes everything! Bah, I want her books so bad.

What I'm Dreading:

Black Friday. Ugh, customers. Don't want to deal with customers. And why are we open on Thanksgiving. Thankfully as far as I know I don't have to work on Thanksgiving, but definitely Black Friday.

What I'm Working On:

Trying to get more organized so that I can get my blogging more consistent.

What I'm Excited About:

All the new holiday gift sets for makeup and nail polish and everything! I love holiday gift sets!

What I'm Watching/Reading:

Watching: I think the question would be what am I not watching! Bahahahahaha! I did binge watch the Heroes Reborn (now caught up). Yay! Hiro is back! Also The Walking Dead (but am not caught up so no spoilers!) and Grey's Anatomy.
Reading: Brain on Fire by Susannah Cahalan. This is a very very interesting read about an investigative reporter who has no memory of month of her life to a disease in which she lost the ability to move or speak. Also in the middle of My Story by Elizabeth Smart which is about her kidnapping back in 2002.

What I'm Listening To:

Youtube, youtube, youtube. It's playing constantly in the background of everything that I do. ItsKeerstin, Wayne Goss, grav3yardgirl, and RawBeautyKristi are just a few that I watch/listen.

What I'm Wearing:

Today (day off): jeans, tshirt, and cardigan. My normal work day: black, black, and more black. Oh, just bought some more black pants today too! :)

What I'm Doing this Weekend:

Halloween. *joy* Ugh, not may favorite thing. Don't want to walk around, wah!

What I'm Looking Forward To Next Month:

The Digit-al Dozen theme of Pinterest Inspired!

What Else Is New:
I got a new to me vehicle! A 2007 Ford Escape, 62,000 miles! Woot woot! (well, not for the car payments though, but I got a great deal).

What do you think? Do you like these types of posts?

I've Got Stuff to Do and.......oh! Pinterest!

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Oh my goodness. As I am writing this post I seriously just got distracted for 15 minutes pin jumping. The topic? Pinterest itself. Yep. I pinned some and liked some and looked down and saw it had been like 15 minutes. Geesh. Yeah, just counted 19 new liked pins, that's not counting the ones I did pinned, on the topic of Pinterest alone. 

Who knew that someday there would be a this great and wonderful system that we could look over and get distracted by! I wish I had, man I could have made some money! :)

I remember when Pinterest was just starting! Yep, showing my age here (hahahaha!). Seriously though, at the beginning (ok, anyone else just sing that Anastasia song? Now you did huh!) you had to be invited to Pinterest. (ok, I know you can still invite, but this was like you had to have one). Yep. No signing up willy nilly like. Well, you could but you were put on a waiting list that could take months! Months! Crazy.

I don't remember the blog I first heard of Pinterest. She was handing out invites and could only give out so many. I asked for one. Didn't get one. Sad face! But then found someone else handing out these golden tickets and lo and behold I was a member! I was part of that exclusive club that was Pinterest. 

I would tell my friends about Pinterest and they would look at me like I was crazy. They just didn't understand. The OCD in me was so happy to have a visual bookmarking system! No, really, you should see my bookmarks on my computer, folders in folders etc. Ooh! Pinterest needs sub-boards! Boards within boards or boardception!

So I just check on some of my oldest boards for the oldest pins. I've been on Pinterest since 2011. Four years? Huh? It was launched in 2010. Wow, it totally seems like it's been around so much longer! But see, I was near the beginning. When it was starting to really get big I had friends ask me how I could only have my first name for my profile. When I signed up you didn't need your full name. Now it looks like you can change it, but why fix something when it ain't broke.

I also remember when my friends and family members finally joined and they were so excited to share pins and I was like, yep-saw that a year ago. I remember when you kept seeing the same pins each time because there weren't a lot of users. But now? Good golly! New pins every second that my feed updates itself (grrrrrr! I hate when I lose my spot and have to restart because it refreshes!).

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Ah yes. Remember when there was a time in which Pinterest didn't tell you you had already pinned an item? Oh I didn't like that, I think that was one of the best updates ever! Though I still see some duplicates on my boards (le gasp!). Also, that feeling of did I pin this already because I don't want others to see I have double pinned something. You know that feeling right? So you like the pin and check your board and either pin or unlike it so that you look awesome! Would this be like pin-shaming? 

Good old Pinterest (well, not as old as I once thought, though I knew it couldn't be really old). Seriously, what would we do without you? We now have new lingo because of it. We now know how to tie scarves 22 different ways and how to fix a scratched CD with a banana (uh?) and fix cavities with butter (say what?) Be careful what you pin. *Think before you re-pin!* Seriously though, this is a pet peeve of mine (and I'm guilty of it).

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But I really do try to click through the pin to see if it's an actual live pin with truthful info, unless it's a photo like this:

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And then I sit there and laugh out aloud, alone, at midnight. Wow. Yep. Sorry for the cuss word, I try not to use them but I have a whole secret board that my sister, niece, and I share with pins that we find that some of our followers wouldn't approve. So we read them together until we are crying!

Ah Pinterest. Thank you so much for being you!

So the reason for this post was why I haven't been posting so much. Well, truthfully? I get distracted and I blame Pinterest. Yep. It's all Pinterest's fault.

Hope you enjoyed this um random post. :)

PS: Don't get me started on being on Facebook when you HAD to have a .edu email to be allowed on. No thirteen year olds then! Or when the status updates had to be in third person: Kirsten is...trying to figure out the wording for this awkward status update for her facebook.

Hi, Everybody!

So I know I have been MIA for awhile now. And I miss you all! I've had a lot of things going on at work (kind of sucks being an adult) and then a lot of personal health issues that I am trying to deal with. 

So though I may not be active on my blog, I am still reading my blogfeed and trying to figure out the keyboard to my new laptop. Ugh! It took me a bazillion times just to write this! New keyboard is shifted over to the left a bit and so all my key strokes are wrong.

I do so hope that I am able to return to my blogging. But for right now I am going to find myself again, I will try to post a bit here and there to let you know how I am doing.

Thank you all for being such wonderful people! It's nice to know that there are still decent people in this crazy world we live in. And the polish/blogger community is full of such amazing people!

Until then..........      

I Use to Think.........

Ok, so when I was a kid I use to think some really crazy things. Didn't we all?

1. What if people were like dolls. Like they wouldn't become alive/animated until I walked into the room. They only would be doing things when I was around.

- how very egocentric of me. :)

2. What if cars were on a conveyor belt and just shifted around to get on and off the freeways.

- I saw my thoughts come to life in Minority Reports (and pretty much any futuristic show)

3. I use to think I would grow up, get married, and become a mother.

- well, we all know how that went (seriously guys? Hello! I'm alive and single!)

4. I use to think that if you put your study notes under your pillow the night before a test you would absorb some of the knowledge.

- now, did I really? Eh, not so much, but when it came to math any help would do!

5. I use to think because I had brown eyes I saw things with more of a browner hue than those without brown eyes.

- I now come to find out my eyes are more of a hazel.

6. I use to think my eyes were brown

- hee-hee!

7. I use to think that The New Kids on the Block were the best band ever!

- well, they are still touring.......

8. I use to think my dolls and stuffed animals would come to life in the middle of the night if I didn't say goodnight and I love you to each one, every night.

- watch way too many Twilight Zones, Talking Tina anyone?

9. I use to think that the name brand on clothing matter and would get me into the "cool" group.

- nah! It just makes you have less money (unless you find them at a thrift store!). I am not adverse to wearing brands that aren't "in". I am currently and have been for a while, rocking Wal-Mart jeans. Yep, it's true.

10. I use to think that if you had any part of your body out of the covers (beside your head, and especially hanging off the bed!) something would get you.

- who am I joking? My body is still trained to do this. I must have the sheets all the way up to my chin no matter the weather!

What did you use to think?

 Don't forget to check out the other links!

The Face in the Mirror

Yikes! Extreme close up! I am not one who likes their picture taken. Never have. This is me. Exactly one month until I turn 34. I can't really complain because I know I don't look my age.

I generally don't look in the mirror that often. Usually it's in the morning when I put my makeup on and then a few times during the day (especially if I have a cold, gotta make sure no one sees anything!) and then at night when I wash my face. I'll go for hours with a bit of mascara under my eye and on my glasses (why does no one tell this?).

I've never been completely happy with the face in the mirror, seriously who is? We are all our own worst enemies. I put my makeup on and think it looks fabulous only to have no one take notice. This photo above was taken with my iPhone, then lightened a bit. I did no other editing (ok, added a watermark). I think the softness is most likely a blur from my phone. :) My skin doesn't really look like that super soft.

There have been times when I've looked in the mirror too long, and that is never a good thing. A long mirror look will get me to picking, and then I'll be there for a while. So I limit my time. I'm trying to be better. There are still a few spots that are bothering me, up near my hairline on my forehead.

Will there come a day in which I will be happy with what I see? Probably not. Is anyone ever really be happy with what they see?  We just need to accept who we are and what we look like. We can do things that can "enhance" or "improve" our looks but the real beauty will only happen once we are truly happy with ourselves and the beauty will shine from within.

And any time I think about these things I laugh because this is what is running through my head:

What do you all think about these types of posts that I am doing. I like these prompts as they have helped me to learn to express myself better on my blog, they take away some of the stress of having to do nails everyday (which I still love, but not always enough time), and they really make me think and put things in perspective.

I hope you will all stay around, nail art is not going anywhere I just need to figure out a way to balance it all. But I did do two manis for next week's Digit-al Dozen theme yesterday! :)

Don't forget to check out the other links!

To Do Today.......Tomorrow.....Someday!

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Oh to do lists, how do I love thee, let me count the ways:

1. I need to work on my nail posts! Also, need to add all those polishes in the black container and bowl next to it to my stash list. Bleh, I hate doing that because I also add them to a spreadsheet that has their collection, year, color, etc (ocd, whatever!)  :)

2. See! Need to plan! This is an overview of the month of January for me. (I got this awesome blog planner from Mamma's Got It Together: Printable Planners) Did I do all those prompts? Nope. All the pink prompts are for Axis of Ineptitude, the green ones are The Crumpet's Nail Tarts 52 Week Challenge (can share the prompts since they are past), dark blue is the Nail Challenge Collaborative (wallpaper!), and finally you can see The Digit-al Dozen week (thankfully over!). I'm going to try and be better next month!

3. Need to organize makeup drawer and be brutally honest about products. But look and my new palette! So excited about the Urban Decay Vice Palette Limited Edition! :)

4. New mirror, and holy cow is it ever bright! Like, I can see dark spots in my vision after! But I don't have really good lighting in my room. But, I need to make a shelf for it to sit on so it is higher, more stable, and I can put stuff under it and not waste that space! :) (plus I should add that I should be using my Wii Fit more instead of having it collect dust right there next to the mirror >_<)

5. Need to clean all my makeup brushes. Bleh! I really don't like doing this, I clean brushes all day at work and hate to do it at home but I do love the end product! :) Don't you just love my brush rolls!? They are from the etsy shop: I Love Pickles Sewing Co. The one on the left is a smaller one and only fits my eye brushes. I'm so glad I paid extra for the larger size for my owl one! :) It also looks like I need another one! >_<

6. I need to get caught up on my blog reading! Eeks! 279, well at least it's not saying 400 or more like it did the other day! Slowly, ever so slowly!

7. Yes! Something to check off my list! I washed all my work clothes (yes there are pants too, just not in the photo). Guess what color I can wear to work? :) Always on the look out for cute all black shirts!

What do you all have planned for today, or the next few days as my luck will have it. :)

Patience is a Virtue

Bleh! Blah blah blah. Mumble mumble mumble. Whatever! >_<

Sometimes, I really am sick of waiting. As you can see, patience is not something that I have in abundance. I do have patience for some things, but somethings are a bit harder to wait for. Um, hello? Where's my knight in shining armor? :)

But I do know that I am glad to have grown up in the 1980s and 1990s. I say this because that generation (in North America for the most part) is the last generation to have had a "normal" childhood. The current generation is all about instant gratification.

Need to make a phone call? Bam! Cell phone! (Didn't have one until 2006!)

Need to get on the internet? Bam! Wifi! (no AOL, no whurrring, buzzing, and beeping of the dial up modem. heck, even having to just push an "on" button on the computer, our first one booted up off two big floppy discs!)

Getting married? Bam! Has brand new ginormous house! (must have all the best stuff now)

Want entertainment while on a road trip? Bam! iPad/Movies! (we had books, guessing games, and air band to the Golden Oldies type of music!)

Want to pee? Bam! Pause your show! (had to wait for a commercial and hope that you got back in time!)

Want to watch one show while taping another/or missed a show? Bam! DVR/Hulu/Netflix etc! (first thing I would do anytime I moved or the new fall season would roll around: check out the TV Guide, not the one on the TV but the little book, figure out times and channels and set VCR to record with timers!)

Want to play? Bam! Video game systems and computers! (we had the outdoors, kids from all over the block playing night games, books, and our own imagination!)

Seriously, I could go on and on about this but I have now written this a day late. Hahahahaha! So let me end with this:

Patience is a virtue........

Ah, I love this movie! :)

Don't forget to check out the other links!

Light or Darkness?

Do you ever have one of those days in which you just can't anymore? Can't pretend, can't think, can't read yet another one of these types of posts let alone right them? 

That's me today. It seems as though all I ever do on this blog is complain about my depression and anxiety. Yes, it's my right to do so, it's my blog. It's a place to write down what I am feeling so that I can move on (in a way). But it can't be that appealing to others (again, does it matter as it's my blog?). To me it does. I hate being the "Debbie Downer". I hate bringing in this darkness that surrounds me and having all to see. This darkness is mine and I shouldn't force it onto others.

Instead I wish to be known for the light that I can bring. Yes, surprise surprise, I can bring light! :) So my hope is that this year I can focus more on the good things in life and report them to you!

Now does this whole post make a lot of sense, but my point is that I am choosing to see the light in the world and in everyone!

Though these are wonderful uplifting things, here are a few pins that I have on my secret board that I don't want everyone to see (because there can be cussing or other such things).

Now, this is not bad, but I think it's hilarious and so true! And it is how I want to change my view on life! :)

Hee-hee! Sorry for the cussing but this is too funny!

Don't forget to check out the other links!

Seriously?

So, whenever I hear that word I think of Grey's Anatomy. Why? I don't know, I speak and think fluently in TV and movie quotes, it's like a little earworm (a catchy bit of music that gets stuck in your head) like this:

or this:

and finally this:

Now, are your eyes and ears bleeding? Muwahahahahaha! Seriously?!

Seriously, don't forget to check out the other links!

13 Geektacular Pictures That Make Me Happy!

Here are 13 geektacular pictures that make me happy or laugh really really hard! Gotta love Pinterest! :)

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 Don't forget to check out the other links!